Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Trying to Understand my Fluctuating Brain Chemistry

All of us who live with ADD or ADHD have a pretty good understanding of the fact that ""distraction" is the bane of our existence.

I've been trying to learn-- mostly through reading lots of web sites and blogs-- about the brain chemistry issue. I don't know if I have gotten any smarter... but I've certainly "taken on" a lot of new information.

The thing that baffles me a bit is the way my tendency to "space out" varies so much in intensity, from day to day. For example, this morning I woke up and got started on my day with a great sense of "focus." And I was able to just "get into it" and get a whole bunch of stuff accomplished... by 10:00am... without feeling any significant compulsion to "go to sleep."

Now, the tasks were no different from any other day. I went to bed at my usual time; I slept about the same number of hours as usual. I had my morning coffee, as usual. So why does it seem "easy" to focus today, but on another day it will feel like pulling teeth.

I recognize that we all have our body cycles to contend with. Society focuses heavily on "women's cycles" but I'm pretty sure men go through monthly cycles, as well. Is that what I experience, when I can focus one day, and not the next... "natural" fluctuations in my body rhythms? Or is there something else? "Environmentally" speaking, it was gray and rainy this morning... does that have an influence?

Beats me. It seems that the more I learn about this "condition" the less I really understand it. The upside is that I have much better awareness of my "self" and what my body and mind is "doing" at any given time.

I guess I'll just keep learning...

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